im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died