Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
