Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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