i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
where are you?
Hypothermia
I just found a bag of teeth...
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
