i just google imaged poop.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Randomize
