So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
