You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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