I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize