She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
