So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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