My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
