I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
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