Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
