I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
