Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
