i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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