we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize