I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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