Your face is a jimmy john
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
