so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Randomize
