fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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