I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
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I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
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Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest