Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize