we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
