Umm I'm too high to move.
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
they call him Oral-B. enough said
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
