It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
