He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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