Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
