I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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