I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize