I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Randomize
