No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
