Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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