Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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