listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize