I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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