he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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