Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
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