spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
