i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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