I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
