i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I AM VODKA MAN
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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