Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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