So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
