Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.Â
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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