You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Randomize
