Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
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This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
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I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
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