He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Randomize
