u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize