It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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